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| Photo by Barbara Mills |
Dear October,
The past few days have been,
well, hectic. To say the least. They’ve been stressful and sad but also rejuvenating
and enlightening and inspiring. The 26th of October, especially. It
seems strange to lump it next to the 27th and 28th
because they pale in comparison, but I’ll do my best to give each day its due.
October 26:
You dawned clear, cold, and sunny. You were the day of Uncle
Stephen’s memorial service. My parents, grandmother and I ate warmed-up ciche
for breakfast in the house next door to my aunt’s, who’s owner had moved out
for a couple of days so that we could be nearby. We spent some time with the
rest of the family and then got a ride to downtown Davidson, where we walked
around, visiting some of the places Uncle Stephen would have undoubtedly shown
us if he’d been there. I had Chai tea at Summit coffee shop, where my aunt’s
band plays every so often. Of course the bookstore was a must, and we couldn’t
leave without buying something. My dad was excited to discover a copy of Looking for Alaska by John Green, and I
picked up a collection of short stories by
Alice Munro. Other hidden gems included a yarn shop with a tiny record store
upstairs, and a cute breakfast place that was closed when we walked by, but I
think someone told us it was one of my uncle’s favorite places. Later we walked
over to the Presbyterian church on the Davidson College campus for the service.
Since we were family we sat in the first couple of pews, but I wish I could
have stood in a corner, marveling at the sheer magnitude of the crowd that
attended: neighbors, friends, business associates, middle and high school
students Stephen had mentored. I suppose it’s no surprise; he made friends
wherever her went. The words shared during the service were beautiful and kind,
people remembering all of the things Stephen had done for them, how he made
them a better person, just by being around. It made me realize how rare it is
to find someone like that, and how sad it is when the world loses them. Last
was a beautiful rendition of “Amazing Grace,” played on the guitar by the
pastor himself.
Music seemed to be the theme of the day. Later that night friends
gathered at my aunt’s house for cocktails and music, just like Stephen would
have wanted. It could have been a somber occasion. We could have felt sorry for
ourselves, shared tears and stories from the hardest moments, but instead the
atmosphere was light. It was a celebration. Old friends caught up on current
events and my aunt’s very large and very talented band played for hours. Music
permeated every corner of the room. During the more popular songs the entire
party broke out in song, and for a moment we all embodied Stephen’s spirit. There
we were, surrounded by friends and family, our hearts beating in time with the
music, our voices raised, completely lost in the moment. We were living life to
fullest, just like he had.
Just like that my time in North Carolina came to an end. My
aunt drove us to the airport and I spent the rest of the day traveling. For
some reason it was harder saying goodbye to my parents this time. I’d been
preparing not to see them until Thanksgiving, and suddenly I got to spend time
with them for a few days. But for some reason, this brief contact made the
prospect of waiting another month before seeing them again worse than before.
After a long, tiring flight I finally arrived in Cedar Rapids.
I’m not sure which felt more unreal: being back on campus,
or the fact that just that morning I had been in the impossibly beautiful town
of Davidson, NC. Even though I had studying to do I went straight to bed and
slept until dinner. I joined my friends for dinner and tried to get back into
the college mindset. Slowly, my brief trip slipped deeper into memory, and I
started looking ahead again. Paper due Wednesday. Soc test Thursday. This next
week is not going to be easy, but I’ll make it through. And I still have Thanksgiving
to look forward to.
October 28:
I got so much work done today! There really is no feeling
like checking everything off of your to-do list. Let’s hope this productivity
lasts...
Several songs for several days:
Way Back When/High Hopes by Kodaline
Stubborn Love by The Lumineers
Awake my Soul by Mumford and Sons
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