"The pages are still blank, but there is a miraculous feeling of the words being there, written in invisible ink and clamoring to become visible." -Vladimir Nobokov

Tuesday, October 15, 2013

Letter #15

Aren't we cute? 
Dear October,
        I can’t believe we’ve reached the halfway point. Like, seriously. How did this happen? It feels like just the other day that I was embarking on this project, and now hear we are, with fewer letters to write than have already been written. It looks like you won’t be letting off on the chilly weather for the rest of this week, but that’s ok. It feels like winter in Texas, and it makes me think of home. It’s funny how so many little things can trigger memories. Like today I watched To Kill A Mockingbird with my film music class. Sitting in the dark auditorium, with the flawless black and white playing out on the big screen, I was flooded with memories of my dad reading To Kill a Mockingbird to me when I was far too young to understand it, and of humming along to the soundtrack whenever he played it on our record player. Eating breakfast in the caf sometimes makes me think of Sunday morning breakfasts, and  the smell of eggs and sausage and occasionally biscuits wafting in from the kitchen while we watched CBS Sunday Morning.  Or the other day, when looking at the picture of Cassie on my bulletin board, I suddenly remembered that I owned a dog, and how much I missed her funny half-ecstatic half-nervous greetings whenever I would walk through the front door. And waking up to an alarm just isn’t the same as being dragged out of bed at 7:30 by my mother, telling me to stop wasting my day and to come see the beautiful light filling the sunroom.
Since moving 2,000 miles away from home, I haven’t had the surge of homesickness that I was expecting. I imagined it would hit me like a wave in the first couple of weeks, causing me to call home every night, before dissipating and leaving to go prey on some other unsuspecting freshman. But that’s not how it is at all. Instead, it creeps up on me when I least expect it, in movies we have to watch for class, and the smell of breakfast, and in those early morning hours when my eyelids feel like weights but there’s my mother’s voice in my head, telling me not to waste a single moment.


ps. Friends, if you’re reading this, I miss you too! Hope you all are doing well, and don’t hesitate to touch base once in a while if you need to talk! (I'm trying to make more of an effort to keep in touch with you, as well. If you haven't heard from me very much, don't worry, the radio waves won't stay silent for long!) Also: If you have my address, I love getting mail! I’m so subtle, I know. :P

Song of the day: "Rivers and Roads" by The Head and the Heart

1 comment:

  1. Eat your eggs before they get cold! Did you brush your hair? Ple-ase eat a vegetable. Don't you want to try that on? Need any help with your school project? Talk to that teacher - teachers want to help you. Sit in the front of the class!
    You are turning out awesome.

    Cassie says "Hi" BTW.

    I loved your description "funny half-ecstatic half-nervous" - that is Cassie all over.

    And thank you a million times for the "Letters to October"

    Mom ;)